Coal to the transcriber of the Dalai Lama's speech Wednesday at the Rhode Island Convention Center, who misheard His Holiness' last words and instead of writing "forget it," typed "fuck it." We look forward to your lucrative future work subtitling children's films.
But a diamond to the 14th Dalai Lama of Tibet. Because you're the Dalai Lama. And because no one can pull off the tricky pairing of a red cape and a Brown baseball cap quite like you can.
Diamond to the MetroMart employee who said the closing of Tedeschi might increase business for his employer and "if sales increase, then it's better for us." Congrats! You've already surpassed the expertise of our Econ 0110 TA.
Cubic zirconia to the senior who recently played the alum-created card game, Cards Against Humanity, for the first time and said, "I think we could do with a bit more laughter when it comes to controversial issues." We think Vice President Joe Biden would be a big fan of your little game.
A diamond to the sophomore who said of the Production Workshop reading of "Mean Boys," a gender-flipped interpretation of the Tina Fey-penned movie, "The more it went on, the more ridiculous it was, but the funnier it became." The same can be said of most Taylor Swift songs.
Coal to the Undergraduate Council of Students for proposing that University administrators do a parody video of the South Korean mega-hit "Gangnam Style." That's the best punch line we could ask for.
A diamond to the Rockefeller Library's newly appointed data visualization coordinator Patrick Rashleigh, who said of the new digital scholarship lab, "We're still experimenting, and we want others to experiment as well." With that attitude, you'd feel right at home in Brown's dating pool.
Cubic zirconia to Professor of Italian Studies Massimo Riva who said of the recent University series of events in Italian art and culture, "We are bringing a little bit of Italy, and we try to bring the best." So are you suggesting a group trip to Federal Hill?
A diamond to Miwa Matreyek, an animator, designer and multimedia artist, who said, "I hope the audience takes away some sense of wonder, happiness or fantastical-ness" after seeing her show last weekend. Dear reader, that is our hope for you as well.