Cubic zirconia to Linda Goldstein Knowlton '87, director of the documentary "Somewhere Between," who said, "adolescence is tricky for everyone - a time when all you want to do is fit in, and all you want to do is stand out." She overestimates our ambition - all we want to do is sleep.
Coal to "Modern Family" star Julie Bowen '91, who said of studying at the Rockefeller library, "Why would you go anywhere else? You were a flask away from an academic party." That explains why she spent her entire junior year in Italy - we're sure there was a lot of "academic" partying there.
A diamond to the sophomore whose series of striking nudes - one entitled "Mrs. God" - is currently on display at the List Art Center. The artist said her work showcases a character that's "partly my family members and partly my imagination." We can't say we'd be thrilled if we came home for Thanksgiving to find a series of nude sculptures partially based on us. But we will answer to "Mrs. God."
Cubic zirconia to the junior who said in response to a lecture about infants learning gender norms before language, "Gender norms are really limiting, and so the fact that something is learned so early that is so limiting to gender identity in general is troubling to me." It's a good thing babies aren't allowed at SexPowerGod then.
Coal to Director of Health Education Frances Mantak who said, "Lots of times I'm helping (students) not be too hard on themselves that they got EMS-ed, and it's hard for a computer to do that." She underestimates the power of AOL instant messenger robot, SmarterChild, our guide through the perils of middle school.
A diamond to University Curator Robert Emlen, who said of former University President Vartan Gregorian's inauguration ceremony, "Vartan - he's hot. He's going to be great at this job." Because everyone knows you can't be a good University president unless you're really, really, really ridiculously good-looking.
Cubic zirconia to the founder of Queen of Hearts, a shoe store on Westminster Street, who said, "We're kind of known for having statement shoes and not always functional shoes." We'll let Lady Gaga know for the next time she visits.
Coal to the sophomore who said of the archeology dig on the Quiet Green, "This is a cool opportunity to get down and dirty with my childhood aspirations." We, too, dreamed of being the first groundhogs to attend Brown University.
A diamond to former President Ruth Simmons, who told The Herald before stepping down, "Maybe that's the way to make decisions - in the dark." And with those sage words of wisdom, we wish you a happy Halloweekend.
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