Diamond to Sen. Sheldon Whitehouse, D-R.I., who said to the Brown Democrats, "They don't want to talk about that stuff." Our professor wasn't thrilled when we used that line in our last discussion section.
Coal to David Ortiz, press secretary for Providence Mayor Angel Taveras, who said fixing city roads "is one of the most important things" the city can do to attract new businesses. We're sure the quality of asphalt on Brook Street is exactly why people aren't coming to Providence.
A diamond to Professor of Philosophy Charles Larmore for saying, "No thinking person, with the exception of a few oddballs, can identify with the ideas of this party," referring to the Republican Party. We salute you for finally clearing up the University's image as a politically ambiguous school.
Coal to the Undergraduate Council of Students for launching a lottery to determine the students who will get to eat meals with President Christina Paxson. Though we appreciate the idea of a contest for food, one version of the Hunger Games was more than enough for us.
A diamond to Brown Badmaash Dance Company for holding a boot camp that one student described by saying, "You dance and then you eat, and then you dance." How is that different from any other day?
Coal to Maureen Moakley, professor of political science at the University of Rhode Island, who called expectations of "good times" in Rhode Island an "unrealistic opinion." We cordially invite her to Chicken Finger Friday.
Cubic zirconia to Kenneth Prestininzi, associate chair of playwriting at Yale School of Drama, who said, "Sometimes we get stingy with our emotional life." Prestininzi clearly hasn't visited our newsroom after midnight.
Coal to Alison Klayman '06, director of the documentary "Ai Weiwei: Never Sorry," who said that despite the busy life the film portrays for its subject, most of Ai's work was spent on Twitter, which she said was "sometimes kind of boring." You think we haven't ever wanted to insert a UFO sighting into our Undergraduate Council of Students coverage to spice things up? But we don't.
Cubic zirconia to the senior Writing Fellow who said, "We're not here to criticize or judge you for your writing." Yeah. We use that one, too.