In her recent article, ("The problem with Thayer on a Friday night," Sept. 22), Camille Spencer-Salmon '14 raises a fundamentally good point. But there is an obvious response that she fails to address, and doing so would lead her position in a new and interesting direction.
Let's pretend Otto, an average man, has read Spencer-Salmon's piece. A natural first reaction to being told that he needs to stop catcalling and objectifying women is one of confusion. He asks, "Why does this make women feel unsafe? I am giving sincere compliments to these girls in the only way that presents itself in the situation. They should stop getting so hurt by trivial matters and just take the compliment."
The "how would you feel if" angle will not work. If a woman objectified Otto, he — and many other men — would find it awesome. High fives all around. There is a sound explanation for why Otto does not and perhaps cannot feel the pain of the women he compliments. He is privileged to be in a group that is not constantly subject to the downsides of objectification. For him, objectification is fun and sexy whether he is the objectifier or the objectified.
That is the thing about objectification — it is not in itself bad. Even a person who would hate to be catcalled on the street might enjoy much more disrespectful behavior in the bedroom. Objectification is only bad when it leads to negative consequences. If someone is accustomed to treating people like objects, they may not be able to treat a person like an agent with rights and responsibilities when it comes down to the wire. Someone gets slut-shamed, hurt or raped.
But objectification is not enough to lead to any of these consequences. If you enjoy B.D.S.M., you are being treated, or treating others, as if you were not quite an agent. If you have ever watched mainstream — or even most sex-positive — pornography, you have probably done the same thing as the man on the street. People do not consume these products because they are interested in the actors' thoughts and feelings. They want to watch attractive bodies.
In no way does this make us bad people, sexists or perpetuators of rape culture and the kyriarchy. So, two questions remain. What things, exactly, do we want to stop? And how do we stop those things with minimal cost?
In answer to the first, we want to stop the acts that are intrinsically bad. Systematic oppression, domestic violence and rape are by definition acts that cannot be performed without hurting someone. Let's stop these. Objectification can be, and often is, done without hurting anyone. Why end it?
The second question is much harder, but we have been making progress. We need to make it clear to everyone that harmful acts are unacceptable and serious. Do not let a sexist comment or rape joke slide. Instill an attitude of reflection in everyone so people can objectify without being disrespectful. Let our children know that they are not worth less because they are not thin or conventionally attractive. Create good women in your creative work to show everyone that women do not just "look pretty and moon over men as they fight crime, save the world, have hilarious adventures and pursue their dreams."
In the meantime, let's objectify more. Think dirty, disrespectful thoughts about your peers. Ogle the attractive men and women in the media. Tell a hot guy that his abs are mountains you want to climb, or a girl that her ass is a peach you would like to nibble. Above all, do not hurt anyone in the process.
More specifically, objectify men more. The hope is that boys and men will realize that they do not want to be objectified all the time and will divorce themselves from the objectifying representations. Realizing that these representations are not accurate, they will be loathe to apply them to the individual women they meet. This may be farfetched, but it is a future worth trying for.
What to say, then, about Dr. Dre's opus "Bitches ain't shit"? We can espouse and express all the lyrics in the song without being disrespectful. The good doctor is simply celebrating the joys of casual sex for both sexes — read the lyrics — while lamenting the lack of trust in such a relationship. This is perfectly acceptable as long as the hos and tricks mindset does not prevent someone from getting a job they deserve or cause someone to get raped.
Returning to Spencer-Salmon's piece, "Why is it that … (women's) bodies are still considered fair game for public scrutiny?" The simple answer — everyone's bodies are fair game for judgment as hot-or-not. If we socialize people to know they can objectify and be objectified without causing harm, catcalls can be the compliments they are meant to be.
David Hefer '12 is a white cis-gendered male who wants to spread the privilege around. All the fly honeys can reach him at david_hefer@brown.edu
