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Diamond to the class of 2014 and to the prospective student who told The Herald Brown was "more chill" than other universities. Just wait until February.

Coal to Art Speigelman P'13 for letting us put a photo of him smoking on the front page. Don't you know there are impressionable young pre-frosh around?

Cubic zirconium to the Wickenden Street "snuggery" Duck and Bunny — we like the sound of it, but aren't those illegal now in this state?

Coal
to the Rhode Island state senators who want to ban tanning for minors. How will this state ever produce another Pauly D now?

Cubic zirconia to the majority of you who told us you were attractive in our recent poll. We applaud you for your confidence, and would give you diamonds, but it looks like you think you're pretty enough all on your own.
But diamonds to the majority of you who said you're in favor of eliminating tableslips. Our domination of your breakfast table will soon be complete!

A muddy old diamond to the College Hill 'Dependent for being good sports at kickball last weekend. You said the rain and mud conflict with your "aesthetic ideology" — looks like winning does, too.

Coal to UFB Secretary Tyler Rosenbaum '11 for telling the board that it needs to "improve relationships" with the community. We don't think your board's lack of communication is the reason you're all single.

And coal to the student who has "been noticing recently a lot of the people (she's) living with are coupled up." What did you think all those extra toothbrushes were for?

Want more D&C? Check out a retro-diamond at blogdailyherald.com, and write your own at diamondsandcoal.com.


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